I am ashamed to say that it is almost 8pm as I am writing this.
I don`t seem to have stopped today, but equally I have achieved very little, save becoming mega-stressed.
DD4 has to have a major dental operation under general anaesthetic , lasting approx 1 hour on the morning of Monday 13th September, and I just cannot get it out of my mind. This will be the eighth time I have had to cuddle one of my children whilst a general anaesthetic is administered, and it gets no easier, I can assure you.
The life of our beloved daughter will temporarily be in the hands of total strangers for a whole hour, and we will be pacing helplessly and praying as one can only pray when a child is having surgery. I *know* she will be in the loving hands of God , but I am worrying nevertheless.
I keep thinking of all the times I have been impatient with her or shouted at her or been unkind to her in some way, and I just feel like the worst parent on earth at the moment. I wish I could turn the clock back and do things differently.
My DH is besides himself with worry.
I will be glad when Monday is safely over. Please, will you all pray for the handmaiden of God, Abigail, as she undergoes her surgery.
Lord, have mercy.